1000 Times Better

11:30pm, November 10th.

I approach the end of my anniversary…my wedding anniversary…the 19th without my beloved. Like every day, I miss Vanita more than I’ve ever been able to adequately express. And, while I know this is often said by many, no part of my life on earth ever was or ever has been better without her. Don’t get me wrong, life is good and full, because God is good and all sufficient. The fulness of God the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit knows no boundaries. However, it’s not life as it was intended. Death is an enemy. It was never suppose to happen. More still, death as the result of crime, of sin, of careless, wreckless, wayward action residing far outside the will of God is tragic. It hurts on every conceivable front. So, truly, with well thought out consideration of all the facts and without reservation, I can say had that awful event never happened life would be one thousand times better…one thousand times one thousand times…and not one part in a thousand was made better by the loss.

Be careful.

Watch your step.

Don’t drink and drive.

Don’t smoke dope and drive.

Don’t pop pills and drive.

Don’t snort, huff, shoot or whatever and drive.

Just don’t do it. Please. Please. Please.


10 thoughts on “1000 Times Better

  1. Rick Burleson says:

    I am sorry for your pain and am grateful for your faith. Though the loss still stings deeply, your ministry of the Gospel and your love for those created in the image of God thrives. Thank you for fighting the good fight my brother. You are a blessing to me and our world!

    • Likewise, my friend. The Lord is ever so much more than we have the ability to describe or proclaim. Until our dying breaths, may it be his name we whisper and shout and declare at every level in between.

  2. Jeannine DeVine says:

    You honor Vanita with every word and action of your daily life here on earth. I am sorry that I was never able to meet her.

    • Thank you for your kindness. What would life be without our lives anchored in Christ? Surely it would not be goodness and mercy that follow us, but brokenness and despair. I’m often reminded that Vanita taught me this more than any other as she would consistently say, “No pity parties here, Bucko, eyes on the Savior.”

    • And I you my friend. You are often in my prayers. It’s a beautiful thing…this capacity the Spirit of God manufactures in our hearts that allows us to translate our pain into his glory. In fact, now more than ever, I think every follower of Christ wears this wonderful gift from the Lord as our last, best form of evangelism. Adversity met in the power of God becomes the advent for tomorrow’s victories in God. Love you, brother. Hugs to Tina and the littles (well, the fully grown littles).

  3. Bob Cassis says:

    Ricki, I think of you and Vanita often whenever I head north and see the sign. Thanks for sharing your pain; it should help readers think about the consequences of their behaviors. Sorry I never met Vanita, I understand she was an exceptional person loved by all the folks at YFC. Although your time together was cut short, you have been blessed beyond belief by the time the time you shared. God bless you my brother.
    Bob Cassis

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